The way most guys approach dating nowadays is by expending all their energy on hooking one girl and then doing their best to keep her. Considering how many women openly enjoy casual sex and keep several guys on the side, for a man to aspire simply to monogamy is a little sad. Let’s face it, the male fantasy of having more than one girlfriend simultaneously is more than just a fantasy, it’s a real possibility. It’s risky though, because feelings always get involved and as they say, hell hath no fury… With that in mind, here are some absolute basics to keep in mind if you’re planning to keep both Zoe and Chloe around.
First off, keep your ladies in the dark about one another. This is harder than it sounds. If they share a social group it obviously isn’t going to work, so as tempting as dating multiple colleagues or classmates may be, they’ll find out you’re playing them quickly indeed. Even if all they share is a neighbourhood, it’s ill-advised. Preferably these women are cities apart and wouldn’t know one another from a bar of soap.
Secondly, avoid adding them to your social media like the plague. It seems like a mistake only a fool would make, but you’d be surprised how many men have gone from having a bevy of beauties available to being a total pariah because ladyfriend number two posted something suggestive on their Facebook wall. Tell them you don’t believe in social media; delete your Myspace if necessary, but keeping your squeezes oblivious of one another is vital. Besides, getting found out is one thing, having it smeared across your newsfeed is entirely another.
Thirdly, make sure that your girlfriend juggling is the only lie you’re trying to maintain. Women get suspicious easily, so don’t give your lady friends any reason to doubt your integrity. If you say you’re going out to visit family, actually go and visit family. If she discovers that your evening with the parents was in fact, a night on the town with the boys, she’ll start wondering what else you’re keeping from her. Ideally the time you spend away from each girl becomes part of a routine she gets used to. Say you’re out of town for a week every month for work meetings at head office. If the rest of your relationship is running like clockwork, she won’t question what you’re getting up to during your absence.
This next one is important: cover your trail and cover it well. Nothing brands you guilty quite like girlfriend number 2’s lingerie on your bedroom floor, or a brown hair on your coat when the lady you’re currently courting is a redhead. Even odour can give you away, so if you think there’s any chance you’ll be seeing both girls on the same day, make sure you’ve showered and changed clothing before meeting up. Covering your trail goes beyond your person though. Avoid taking them on dates to the same places, or introducing them to the same people. Your lips might be sealed, but you can’t guarantee that others will be too.
If exclusivity is genuinely your thing, that’s all fine and well, but there’s no shame in playing the field a bit. Just remember to do so with a bit of tact and plenty of caution.
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